Let’s talk about PORN
Over the years, I have ministered to many people who were struggling with online porn. I’ve received phone calls from young women who found porn on their husband’s computers. I’ve heard from older men by eMail who found themselves out of control because of porn.
Men in the church have tearfully asked for help regarding this bondage as well. In marital counseling these days, because of its prevalence, I spend one session discussing this issue. In some cases, online porn became offline porn. Magazines, sex shops, strip clubs and prostitution.In Charisma Magazine, I read about a minister who found an adult romance novel in his church parking lot along with beer bottles and other party paraphernalia. A few choice words on a page got his attention. He was hooked, One level of porn led to another including visiting prostitutes and, ultimately, the destruction of his ministry. His wife’s testimony of restoration was even more inspiring than the level of courage he displayed in coming forth with his addiction problem. God is restoring his ministry and marriage.
Many of the people I’ve ministered to were addicts. They were as addicted to porn as any heroine addict or alcoholic gets addicted. Like the drunk who says he can stop at any time but won’t, they didn’t have an addiction; the addiction had THEM!
Before you envision some guy will a 3-day growth of beard sitting at his computer in his underwear, I’ve spoken to teen and college girls - sweet Christian ladies - who tearfully asked for prayer because they, too, started looking at online porn and couldn’t stop.
I’ll never forget the series Dawson McAllister did on his radio show; it was all about porn. One of his callers was the sweetest sounding Christian school girl. She said all her friends were passing around a website. She looked it up and found herself getting sucked deeper and deeper into porn. The cry in her voice is what I remember most. Other girls called wondering if, because they found themselves aroused while watching other women engaged in sex, deep down, were they themselves really lesbians? Suddenly, they were struggling with their own sexual identity!
Do you see Satan’s fingerprints all over these situations? I hope so.
One woman told me that her Christian husband liked for her to watch porn with him as a prelude to sex. She hated this and felt degraded but was ‘being submissive.”
UGGGH!
In every case, these individuals felt like Christian hypocrites. They couldn’t understand why they weren’t overcoming and why the enemy was having his way with them. Their Christian wheels were spinning in the same rut and they were extremely frustrated. It was changing their countenance and demeanor. That which promised a momentary thrill was now stealing their joy.
MAKE A COVENANT WITH YOUR EYES
Would you think me insane if I were to say, “Hey, guys, this weekend, prowl your neighborhood at night, looking in all your neighbor’s bedroom windows. If you’re lucky, maybe you’ll catch a pretty woman or girl in her underwear…or less!”
I’m not certain how this is ANY different than what we’re doing when we see a Victoria’s Secret ad on our TV screen; it’s still a woman under glass. Somebody explain to me the difference in seeing topless or nude women in a PG-13 or R-rated movie and peeping in a lady’s window? Those individuals are somebody’s children, daughters and mothers. Some are drug addicts who’ll do anything for money so they can get their next fix. All of them require deliverance from sexual addictions, spirits of lust, bi- and homosexuality. On top of that, the photographers, make-up artists, directors, producers, publishers…there’s a whole list of hard-hearted, selfish and Godless individuals who are exploiting others in an effort to get rich.
Are they exploiting you, too?
Job made this statement. In 31:1, he said, “I have made a covenant with my eyes; Why then should I look upon a young woman?
Billy Graham said, when it comes to looking at the female anatomy, that first look is free; after that, you’re accountable.
Jack Hayford, from Church on the Way, told of a time when he was sharing a hotel room with another minister at a conference. The story went something like this: While the other man lay reading his Bible - something Hayford admits he would have been better off doing - he started flipping through the TV channels. On one station, he said, he saw something which caused him to pause for a second. The next second, he realized what he was looking at: pornography. The third second, he focused in and watched. Suddenly, he came to his senses, shut it off and panted, “Did you see that?”
The other minister looked up, “See what?”
“Nothing…,” he snapped back, as he turned away from the set. Lying in bed, he couldn’t get the image of what he had seen out of his head. He said that he prayed and asked Jesus for help. The Spirit revealed to him a vision of a human heart covered with leaches. He realized that this is what happens when an individual exposes themselves to porn.
ADDICTED TO JESUS
Whatever you may be addicted to, learn to give thanks at ALL times. “Thank you, Lord, that I have an addictive nature…that means I can just as easily get addicted to Jesus!” If you find yourself going back to look at porn like a dog returning to its vomit (Prov 26;11), rejoice for you are one step CLOSER to the day of your deliverance and this was one less occasion in which you will ultimately participate. After all, how do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.
In addition, confess your problem to another to whom you can be made accountable. There are Christian resources where you can get a Hotmail account and discuss anonymously your porn addiction.
Google “Shelley Lubben.” She was a porn actress who was also involved in prostitution. Today, she’s an ex-porn star - a Christian wife and mother with a message, fighting against this multi-billion-dollar industry filled with lies and deceit, rampant with drugs and alcohol. Her testimony is amazing. For a while, she had my message
“Pornography: dethroning the God of the Bod” on her site. That message is ranked as my 9th most popular message on www.EzineArticles.com, incidentally.Why so many hits, I wonder?
Finally, and perhaps most importantly, I just received this message from Revivalist Larry Silverman. It’s called
“Porn Struggles” and you can read it at his blog. It’s an excellent, short read. Powerful! The enemy has always used sex as part of his arsenal to slow down the army of God. There’s nothing new under the sun. Just bear in mind that the Victor lives WITHIN you.
“Greater is He that is IN YOU than he that is in the world,” (1 Jn 4;4). (Emphasis mine.)
The Nation is only as strong as The Church; The Church is only as strong as our families; our families are only as strong as our marriages.
HEY, CHRISTIANS!
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Let’s talk!
Every blessing,
Michael Tummillo
A servant of God
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