Do YOU have it?
Nixon didn’t have it. Hillary has glimpses of it, sometimes. Obama has it by the truckload. Gore actually has it now, but didn’t have it when he was in office. George W. had lots of it once. Occasionally, he still does. Ronald Raegan had it. Kerry didn’t have it at all. Clinton did. Carter didn’t. John Edwards, after he and his wife revealed that his campaign would go on, despite her recurrance of breast cancer, just shot to the top of many people’s lists.
We’re talking about Likability. Those who have it, despite our differences, are more likely the kind of person you wouldn’t mind hanging out with - at least for a little while; sharing a meal, having a beer, going bowling with. We see them as folks who would probably be alot of fun as individuals, their politics aside. Many people will win an election simply because of their Likability. They can be “all show and no go” but, it seems, America doesn’t really care, as long as you’re perceived as likeable.
When the “Cheers” series was on TV, I used to wonder why the Church couldn’t be a place where everybody knows your name. It was apparent that everybody who hung out at the Cheers bar did so because they were accepted there. Then I wondered how many hurting people WANTED to be accepted in Church but never really were. I meet them and speak with them all the time.
I’ll never forget the British witch who wrote me and mentioned that, when her Christian mum was hospitalized, it wasn’t her church that came through with an outpouring of concern - it was the witches in her coven and the blokes down at the pub. Cards and flowers from witches and drunks filled her room.
A woman I know who had a Christian children’s TV show on Saturday’s in Canada, told me that, when she was very ill, it was her Mulsim neighbors who came through with meals and concern, not the church. She added, “if I hadn’t been so strong in my faith, I would have converted.”
A elderly Mormon man with a neck brace told me that he had been a Baptist preacher in his younger days. When he was diagnosed with deteriorating neck bones, unable to work, unable to care for himself, he was abandoned by his church. The Mormons, on the other hand, bought him a mobile home and helped him by a car from me. We became friends and, eventually, he began attending a Christian church nearby.
The Bible says, “If you want friends, show yourself friendly.”
Spurgeon said, “Don’t give a man a tract unless you wrap it in a sandwich.”
It’s been said that people don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care. I’m NOT talking about being a shmoozer or a manipulater. That will only last so long before they catch on. I’m talking about sincere, concerned, dedicated, serving love for your fellow man. Counterfeits WILL be found out.
Time for a check-up:
What’s your Likability quotient?
Do you have friends? No…I mean REAL friends? If you do, fight for those relationships. Nurture them. Sure, they’ll be tested. Make sure you pass those tests.
Those who ARE drawn to you…are they drawn to you because you have kindred-spirits? Is it because they see Christlike characteristics, or is it based on something else? Drug users will always befriend the working junkie…until he’s arrested, that is. Then nobody visits him there.
I found this Yes-R-No quiz online. “Fifteen qualities of a likable person.” Go ahead and take the test. It’s fun. rejoice when your answer is positive. Pray about and work at those you fail at.
1. People frequently compliment me on my smile or positive outlook.
2. I usually get great service wherever I go.
3. My doctor spends more time with me than most other patients.
4. My family stays in constant contact with me.
5. People readily listen to me and remember what I tell them.
6. My love life is fulfilling, and my partner can’t wait to see me.
7. I get more opportunities at work than most.
8. People typically describe me as lucky.
9. Others smile when they hear my name.
10. People tell their friends about me and “sell me”.
11. I like most people that I come in contact with.
12. I have meaningful relationships as opposed to transactional ones.
13. When someone is rude to me I don’t let it spoil my mood.
14. I tell the truth, even when it isn’t good news.
15. When another person spends time with me, he/she feels good afterward.
Jesus said people will hate us because of Him, though they may hate us because we’re rude or obnoxious, too. I’ve had doors slammed in my face over Jesus, but I’ve had others chase me down BECAUSE they wanted to know Him, too.
What about you? God can change your heart, clean out the pettiness and the selfishness, and raise you out of a life consumed with selfishness and worn down by the petty evils we see around us. God wants to renew the world, person by person - and He can start in your own life. Think of it as the ultimate, divine “random act of kindness” - and honor this act by performing acts of kindness, big or small, random or premeditated, in your corner of the world.
Here are some verses of Scripture that may assist you in your quest for Likability:
You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get?
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.
Now, go and be Likable to somebody. Start at work; it’s where we spend the most time. How about with your neighbors? Many don’t even know who they are. An old boss used to take his entire cul de sac to eat every week. It reaped dividends. Talk about THEM (it’s their favorite subject). Use their name as you converse with them, sprinkling your conversation with it as you go (ever notice how a dog perks up when his name is used? People are the same way.) Ask about their family (just look at the pictures on their desk).
Every blessing,
Michael Tummillo
A servant of God
Date posted: Saturday, March 24th, 2007 6:08 am | Under category: Post
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